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Posted: Tuesday, 15 January 2008 5:11PM
This is my blog
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It is a good blog. Or it will be. I have been told I have permission to talk like an adult. Which means sometimes I will be using big words, and other times I will be using smaller ones, in order to best get my thoughts across in a manner other adults will be able to understand. This means it will not be uncommon to see entries that have words like "encomium" and "prosthetic" next to words like "fuckbeans." and "shitcock."
I cannot SAY these words on the air, but luckily for me, the FCC has no jurisdiction over the internet, and as such, can't fine either me, this radio station, or anyone for committing the thoughtcrime of speaking like a normal human being to other normal human beings. I find this a little freeing. Also freeing: The ability to say as much as I want without having to worry about commercial breaks, song loads, 25 minute three-in-a-rows from Tool, and belligerent callers ringing me up to tell me what a fag I am for not punching camaros with gloves made of beef while snorting bacon flavored cocaine out of the ass-crack of a stripper.
This blog will discuss pretty much anything that enters into my bald, pointy little head. Comedy, politics, mothers, television, frogs, office drama, Cort's ass, ambitions, disappointments, frivolous bullshit and important stuff I probably shouldn't be sharing online with the entirety of the interconnected world. I'm sure at some point I'm going to say something you want to forward to your friends, either because you agree, or you think I stole it from you, or you want to prove to your internet friends how much cooler you are than me by linking to the blog for the sole purpose of laughing at my 30 year old, sad, pathetic, night-show co-hosting ass. I thank you in advance for all the above listed reasons, and any other reasons you may have.
I also thank you for listening to our show. Seriously, if you listen, thanks for doing that. I hope you dig it muchly. If you don't listen, let me offer this appraisal: It kicks unholy fucking ass. I've been told by at least 3 different close friends and relatives who would have absolutely no reason to lie to me that this is the case. If you are skeptical, I dare you to try the "You'll crap your pants in laughter or your money back" trial, where you download one weeks worth of podcasts from cortandfatboy.com here, and if you haven't made butt oil in your jockeys at the end of the week, you'll be deemed quite hygenic and in total control of your faculties, and probably a contributing member of society who might be okay to breed later.
Okay, so, that's out of the way. I just wanted to get all this up front before we descend into the pureed mess of neuroses that is in the inside of my head.
If you got any questions, email me, drop a note--I think we got messageboards coming at some point. No question is off-limits. Go to town.
Thanks for listening. I love you to death and beyond. It's an undead, zombie-ish sort of love.
Fats |
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101.1 KUFO-FM. Rock 101 KUFO. The Rock of Portland. Since launching on January 23, 1990, 101 KUFO is the dominant rock leader in Portland. KUFO has evolved into the place where the world’s greatest rock music meets the world’s greatest on-air personalities. Current premiere rock artists like Foo Fighters, Linkin Park and Tool meet rock legends like Led Zeppelin, Metallica and Ozzy; while weekday mornings get started by Adam Carolla in mornings, followed by middays with Bozyk, the Marconi Show in afternoons and Cort & Fatboy in the evenings, KUFO has relatable and unique hosts. For over a decade, KUFO IS The Rock of Portland.
www.KUFO.com
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