|
Good news! Chinese Democracy is done, stupid! It's been done for a long time, idiot. And it should be out sometime in the near future, retard. Now how about you suck it, dick water, and quit asking stupid questions that everyone knows already. That was essentially the tone of the answers given by Axl's manager when asked about the condition of the record by a British journalist. Axl's manager, who for our purposes we'll call Captain Condescending, announced that Chinese Democracy was done before Christmas, adding, "Everybody knows that." Everybody know that, huh? Really, let me check the internet for what everybody knows about Axl. Everybody knows that he is probably the biggest prima donna weepy pants in the industry, with the exception of maybe Celine Dion. Everybody knows that he's about one bad review from shoving his feet back into a couple of empty Kleen-Ex boxes, crawling back into his LA mansion, locking the door behind him and getting back to adding to his urine jar collection. And of course everyone knows that Axl has spent over a decade working on an album that would have to sell more copies than there are people on the planet just to make back the production costs. But no, apparently no one knows that that fat turd finally finished his magnum opus. According to Captain Condescending, Axl is just negotiating with unspecified parties when the disc will be released. There are rumors that when record does drop, it will be done Radiohead-style where fans get to name their own price, but that's likely to be a damn lie because there's no way that Axl's going to let people get away with paying nothing for his masterpiece. The other likely "damn lie" is that Chinese Democracy could come out in late summer.
For years fans have been clamoring for previously unreleased Jane's Addiction material to be released, begging, pleading, please god, give us more Jane's Addiction... Is he gone? Whew. OK, sorry. Perry Farrell was just out in the hall. I didn't want to hurt his feelings. Actually no one has been clamoring for anything of the sort. And I say this as a man who has wrecked several cassettes of both "Nothing's Shocking" and "Ritual de Habitual" over the course of the 4 years spanning junior year in high school to sophomore year in college. I am a fan of the band, but after the collection of unreleased demos and live tracks on "Kettle Whistle," I can honestly say, "Enough. Let it rest. Leave dead things in the past." But apparently my warnings are not keeping Perry and friends from cracking open the Necronomicon and breathing new life into the Jane's Addiction corpse. Jane’s Addiction drummer Stephen Perkins is currently working on putting together a box set focusing on unheard live performances from the group. He says, "It's going to be loaded. We're hoping to step it up into kind of a more 'collector's item' sort of situation. As far as the content, I've got a whole six or seven boxes full of stuff. We're going through it with Warner Bros., and seeing what's appropriate – what's usable as far as, 'How far do we want to go with lo-fi?' In a perfect world, I would hope to see it out by the summer, but I don't think that's possible. Maybe fall." He of course didn't rule out the possibility of another Jane's reunion. |
